NEW YORK SEX WARS

A DIVORCE CAKE - the latest way to celebrate a legal unshackling

Well, I say celebrate. None of the three women I went out for a drink with this week, whose husbands have divorced them, were celebrating. Divorce, among the parents at my kids school is a way of life. In fact, I meet lots of women here, aged 40-plus with husbands either threatening it or instigating the big 'D'. For the three girls I went for a drink with this week, two of them cited the same reason for their divorce 'he wanted to date again'. Pardon????!!!!!!

Bubbling under New York's 'high society' is the constant fear of being divorced. It's one reason why women work so hard to maintain their looks. The race to own a wealthy bloke in NYC is blatant and cut-throat among a lot of women, professional/working/whatever. The scene is more like you might find at a football club or on a sinker estate than in the 'upper echelons' of society. I am not making myself very clear but let me try harder: all those bankers want perfect trophy wives. The wives pander to this. There doesn't seem to be much depth to many of the marriages I come across. This is a huge, sweeping generalisation of course and I do know lots of happy couples too. However, on an everyday level, I've met quite a few women now, who have just been dumped. The divorce laws are OK, but ultimately, it's about more than material wealth. Of course I feel sorry for these women who end up broke and homeless by the time they are 50 (palimony for the kids dries up when they grow up) but they should have found some way to support themselves!

I am really, unpleasantly surprised by this little aspect of NYC life.  The New York Rumour that there are more single men than women is constantly peddled and permeates everyone, it's hateful. I've even been out to dinner with couples who, when I've complimented her on a great body or fabulous hair, the wife will whisper to me, 'I have to do it, I don't eat/have extensions - whatever, so he won't leave me'.  It's sad and depressing but seems to be the 'norm'.  Very disturbing and makes me feel like New York needs a Female Revolution. Similar to what's happening in Egypt. The women need to take to the streets and refuse to date the men. All women, from all walks of life must say NO or the situation will only worsen. Already, a lot of NY men are arrogant. Our banking special advisor emails me and says 'I need you to ring me and schedule and appointment' because he wants to sell me something. What? His attitude is purely sexist. I haven't met him and don't intend to. What I am driving at overall today is, despite all the feisty ladies in NYC I have discovered a sexist, unequal undertow, pulling at the psyche of the women of this city. I don't like it one bit.